Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Wong's Beauty Parlour ....

Women in Gurgaon, they all look the same .... Straight tresses of hair with golden streaks in an effort to go European, skin freshly waxed making them resemble a dressed chicken, wearing huge sunglasses and impeccable make-up even late in the evening stumbling upon barricades, holding a clutch and a mobile, talking endlessly, conforming to the Gurgaon dress code for women .... capri coupled with a sleeveless, tight top. I find it very amusing ....
I never visit the beauty parlour or buy clothes myself, unless there is a wedding in the family, especially my in-laws' family. I am apprenticed when it comes to matters of beauty and skin care or even wardrobe and I hate exposing myself amidst such veterans of beauty all staring at my unkempt looks. So, I prefer staying safe and secure inside my cocoon, wearing light make up on special occasions and dressing in whatever is gifted to me by my family and friends over the years. But, this is very often challenged by my husband and my best friend, Soni, who really prefer dressed chicken over a bowl of salad ..... Ha!
A couple of days back, my sister-in-law had come over from Canada and she wanted to get some basic beauty stuff done like waxing, facial, eyebrows etc. And, guess what? I was supposed to give her company at the parlour. I could not fight back this time, against my husband, sis-in-law, bro-in-law, pa and ma-in-law and they managed to brain wash me into getting some treatments done myself, after a year without any beauty jobs. I was anxious the whole day and finally it was 5 pm .... "Time to go the parlour .... Hurry Up!", screamed my sis-in-law and I unwillingly sat beside her in the car.
We reached the market and I was as nervous as a patient awaiting a surgery in the OPD. It was a hot day and there it was ....
"Wong's Chinese Beauty Parlour"
"Chinese? .... ", I thought. Why Chinese? Was it meant, for the Chinese or by the Chinese or of the Chinese.
I entered the aircon chilled room and was greeted by a sweet looking girl and I saw a man of Southeast Asian descent, probably the owner, was it Mr. Wong himself (?), staring at me as if I was Mowgli coming right out of the jungle and had to be given a more civilised look. I clutched the hands of my sis-in-law, who appeared to be more confident. We were handed over the rate list and my jaws dropped looking at that exorbitant price list. The cheapest facial was for Rs.450, a Fruit facial followed by Rs.550 for Aroma facial going up to Rs.1050 for some strangely named facial. Waxing for for Rs.400 (full body) ..... I started with some mental mathematics and it ran into thousands for the two of us. I gave a sigh of relief thinking that I would be able to demotivate my husband over the phone by saying I am running out of cash but, alas! he came up with a solution of getting everything done and he would turn up with the balance cash later. (Personally, I feel it is colossal waste, sheer murder of money when one spends over such temporary things ... explains why I hate visiting beauticians even after years of neglect. )
So, my sis-in-law decided we go for Aroma facial, bleaching of face, waxing and eyebrows. We went sent to separate cubicles and Mr. Wong asked us to hurry up as there were other appointments lined up.
The beautician looked at me like a butcher would, sharpening his knives and she smiled at me in a failed effort to make me feel comfortable and here is what that followed ....
I was asked to change into a gown, of sorts .... It appeared to be a free size blue coloured strapped, sleeveless frock, if I may say barely falling into any category of decent clothing which is defined to be covering bodies. I somehow mustered up the courage to wear it and felt sorry for myself just like a model walking down the ramp experiencing a wardrobe malfunction. Yikes! I shuddered at the very thought of wearing that for the next hour or so.
I stood there, frozen like a scare crow before being asked to take position for the waxing. I could see the beautician take out the knife and putting some hot, molten wax all over me. Ouuccch!! It was such a horrible experience. Wonder why females want to go through it every fortnight. My discomfort with the beauty gown was so obvious that my desi beautician sensed it. "Arrey Madam! Why are you so shy? You have no idea of what all gets waxed here. You are getting just your limbs procedured. Your fears are so illogical. Just relax.", she said in pure hindi in an attempt to calm me down. These words set my mind into a tizzy trying to understand her words and more importantly, how am I supposed to appease myself through them. After an excrutiating session, it finally got over. Good Riddance!
It was turn for the facial now. I was asked to lie down over the facial bench. My face was thoroughly examined and comments were aplenty. "Madame, aapney kitney dino se facial nahi karaya? Kitney black heads hain .... aur itney blemishes .... aapko toh ozone treatment ki zaroorat hai ....", it would have gone endlessly if I hadn't intercepted, politely asking her to shut her stinky mouth up and start with her hands. The aircon was freezing and I was feeling cold to the last bone, in my skimpy, useless beauty gown. What a torture in the name of beauty treatment! I was thankfully given a sheet to make myself comfortable. Barring for the relaxing facial and neck massage everything else was bothersome ..... the bleach which made my eyes runny and my skin itchy, the black head removal with the hopelessly painful screw like tool, the facepack which would just refuse to dry up and when it finally did, I was barely able to talk owing to the stiffness on the skin, left at the mercy of the beautician who went elsewhere for a good 30 minutes until I threatened to leave. I definitely got worked up!
After I was cleaned, I dressed back again hurriedly as there was a queue of ladies waiting to enter the torture chamber after me.
I came out and there we had Mr. Wong again, giving me a pleased look, very similar to the expression on a Dog Trainer's face when he is finally able to tame the pet on toilet manners and other tricks. I had to wait because my sis-in-law hadn't finished yet, prolonging my exposure to the much avoidable Mr. Wong. I glanced at all the awards and certificates he had received from The Blossom Kocchar herself and a few snaps of Mr. Wong with other celebrities.
I felt quite intimidated and very often our eyes met and it was so obvious that he wanted to say something. Finally, he broke his silence and spoke in a reasonably good angrezi - "Madam, I would suggest a smart haircut for you, blunt in front and steps at the back which will bring life and bounce to your oval face. Try it!" I politely got myself out of the conversation saying I had other committments for the evening and asked my sis-in-law to hurry up as it was getting too much for me to handle getting constantly analysed in terms of my face and hair etc.
Finally, it was all over and I brought some cash and paid off the bill.
I stepped out and gave a sigh of relief !
K~ and her Dad were quite appreciative of how I looked making me feel a lot better after all that I had gone through ..... But, still not enough to change my mind against beauty parlours!
I certainly have a new found respect for all the women who prefer going through this horrible ordeal so often just to look good!

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